Allowing Others to Control You By Pushing Your Buttons…..

Friends, we all have found ourselves in situations in which we have overreacted because someone pushed our buttons. For example, when I was in high school, my bus driver (whom was also a high school student) walked by me in the hallway and she looked at me and made an inappropriate comment to me. Well guess what, a few seconds later, she and I were rolling on the floor in Hall A, going at it, blow for blow. #PushedButtons

Later that afternoon, we both were sitting in the Principal’s office. We were suspended from school. Looking back on it, I can honestly say I “overreacted” because I allowed her to push my buttons. In hindsight, I could have ignored her and gone about my business, but I didn’t. And I suffered the consequences of school suspension.

Now friends, that was in high school, I’m an adult now, so allowing the actions of others to push my buttons is no longer on my agenda. However, I see many people around me that  allow others to push their buttons all day long.

So today, I would like to bring the importance of being in control of your emotions  into your awareness, so that you do not allow others to control you by pushing your buttons.

Friends, if you don’t take any other nugget away from this discussion, the one thing that I hope you will absorb into your mindset is that you control your emotions and actions. Others do not have control over your emotions or actions, simply because they push your buttons, you have 100 % control over your emotions and how you react to situations.

Every time that you allow yourself to react to the actions of others you are giving that person control over you. When you respond to someone that pushed your buttons, then you are using precious energy that can be better utilized for something much more productive.

May I share a personal experience with you? During my marriage, when my mother-in-law and I interacted, it was like missing oil and water. We didn’t mix well at all. Some things just don’t get along well with each other and she and I were no exception to this rule. You could mix us together and shake as hard as you like but we could never become friends. And every single time that I interacted with her, I found myself reacting to her behavior. Typically, our interactions ended with her leaving my home to drive back 6 hours to her own home, or hanging the phone up on me.

Now friends, I truly wanted to be friends with my mother-in-law, but she just didn’t like me. No matter how hard I tried, nothing that I said or did changed how she felt about me.  Each time we interacted, she took every opportunity to push my buttons to get a reaction and I allowed it.

In hindsight, I realize she possibly wanted a reaction, so that she could prove to my husband that I was not the right one. I’m not sure but I imagine after she pushed my buttons and I reacted to her, she would sit back and say to my husband, “now look at her”.  And honestly, I fell into her “trap” every time, until I became aware that she was purposely pushing my buttons to get a reaction out of me. Once I realized her actions and behavior were being done intentionally to get a reaction, I no longer allowed her to push my buttons. Eventually, I learned to smile and keep calm whenever she initiated a combative situation.

Ask yourself are you giving others control and power over you by reacting to their behavior when they intentionally push your buttons? #Smile #KeepCalm

Sharon D. Meadows is a Certified Professional Transformation Coach and the Author of the Amazon Best – Seller, Journey to A New You—A Transformational Guide to Discovering Your Inner Strengths!

Please connect with Sharon, to ask her what’s the next step to get you on the Journey to a New You, Contact Me! #LetsTalk

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Posted on September 27th, by sdmeadows in Coaching.

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